Author’s Note: This is not travel related. You can skip this post.
On the days when I thought being anti-social was the right track, you came into the picture and gave me a different perspective about the world. Our silly conversations and nonsense debates made me realize that there is much that I can share to people. And so instead of falling into the depths of pandemonium, I opened my doors and entertained the idea of the ‘what-ifs’ and ‘could-have-beens’ of “us”.
For years, we got each other’s back and developed a sense of comfort, not so many people could ever imagine would exist. We’ve grown so comfortable that we’d be celebrating a decade of this charade now. Ultimately, over the years, it became too difficult not to develop a special feeling towards you. Come to think of it, you became my confidante on my sentiments about work, life, family, and even on days I could no longer understand myself. You have withstand my irrational mood swings and short-temperedness. But more than anything else, you’ve seen me evolve over time and accepted me for what I am not, behind social media facade and tangible achievements.
Ours is a complicated relationship that struggled between friendship and haphazard romance. We got too comfortable with the idea of being a ‘chat away’ that we no longer deem meetups as necessary. We tried, but for so many reasons, we always fall back to where we’ve always been – strangers. We’ve gone too fearful to entertain the ‘what-ifs’ and ‘could-have-beens’ and settled with “maybes”. We are just a ‘chat away’ but the distance between each letter of the keyboard seemed miles and miles away. I wished you were there on special occasions – to which you never bothered even sending a simple greeting thinking I find them unnecessary. I wished we could have pursued that movies together and debate in person how they made us think and feel. I wished we could dine together and exchange harsh comments on how picky both of us are. There are so many things I wished we could have done over this decade of sending sweet nothings and punitive comments towards each other… but then again… we’re just strangers, right?
So if you happen to read this (which I doubt because you’re always too lazy to read), I want to tell you how you mattered and how you created so much impact in my life; but I guess we have to end this charade. I’ve gone too tired waiting for those plans to happen; I’ve gone too hurt to expect something more. I have to pull back my hopes which have gone to high and bring back my senses. We have to finally put a period on these series of commas and semi-colons because at the end of the day, statements paved of more importance than phrases. I have to finally become an independent clause.
PS. All photos were taken using Huawei Gr5 and processed via Vsco. This was during summer time when the flowers of the narra tree started to fall and gather on the grounds – which then prompted us to do this photoshoot. Thereby, photos are not related to content of this post. HAHA. See more updates on Facebook and Instagram!