I had been the cause of many outbursts these past few days. And when you are blamed (or accused) of things which are generally not all yours for the taking, you’ll begin to wonder what on Earth have you done to deserve such indignities. Had it happen in my “know-it-all” younger days, I would have loved to exchange harsh comments and ugly remarks with people. But my experience with all the interactions I had with individuals met on travels, hikes, and at work made me realize how fruitless it is to persuade others of my “truths” with the “truths” that they believed in, as they have emotional and irrational beliefs just like I do. And just like me, they, too, have struggles to attend to.
I’ve met a former colleague the other month. We were not on the level of kinship where we openly share the hardship we are facing, so I was really not updated on the burdens that she has been dwelling with. (I’m not fond of prying into other people’s business, unless it concerns me.) It was through that meetup that I’ve learned that both of her parents were undergoing operations after operations, medications after medications. Her other sibling, whom we knew as one of the main financers of the family, also got ill. At that time, I couldn’t imagine how she keeps up with life. How her meager salary could suffice the family’s needs. How she managed her time to attend to everyone in the family. And despite all the burdens, how she kept her faith when it’s easier to question such fate. I still feel heavily burdened upon sharing this, how much more on her part. But she just laughed at me and said, “Life’s difficult, Marj. We all go through different levels of difficulties. If lose my faith on Him, to whom shall I cling on?”
Many of us these days do not see the significance of sufferings. We want life to be easy on us. We love complaining and fishing for sympathies from others. We avoid responsibilities and attribute to others our miseries, our heartbreaks, our pains. But there is wisdom in absorbing the blow without complaints. Sometimes, the best answer comes in silence. Discernment. Resiliency is made stronger to those who embrace sufferings; for it takes a great amount of abilities to suffer indignities without losing self-confidence and composure.
Suffering is a fundamental part of our lives. It comes in various forms; all to teach us lessons necessary to keep us going. And when everything feels like crumbling into pieces, remember to talk to Him. Ask Him why, until when, why me, why not them, and all the other questions you are so tired of dealing with. Rant until you ran out of questions. Until you’ll feel His warm embrace; telling you, “I’m here. Worry no more.”
As how one of my current colleagues says it: avoid saying to someone struggling that “God doesn’t give you anything you can’t handle.” It’s making God look sadistic. And that He is just playing favorites. Instead, say, “God will provide all the help you need to handle the situation.”