I had been the cause of many outbursts these past few days. And when you are blamed (or accused) of things that are generally not all yours for the taking, you’ll begin to wonder what on Earth you have done to deserve such indignities.
Had it happened in my “know-it-all” younger days, I would have loved to exchange harsh comments and ugly remarks with people. But my experience with all the interactions I had with individuals met on travels, hikes, and at work made me realize how fruitless it is to persuade others of my “truths” with the “truths” that they believed in, as they have emotional and irrational beliefs just like I do.
And just like me, they, too, have struggles to attend to.
I met a former colleague the other month. We were not on the level of kinship where we openly share the hardship we are facing, so I was really not updated on the burdens that she has been dwelling with. (I’m not fond of prying into other people’s business, unless it concerns me.) It was through that meetup that I learned that both of her parents were undergoing operations after operations and medications after medications. Her other sibling, whom we knew as one of the main financiers of the family, also got ill.
At that time, I couldn’t imagine how she kept up with life. How her meager salary could suffice the family’s needs. How she managed her time to attend to everyone in the family. And despite all the burdens, she kept her faith when it was easier to question such a fate.
I still feel heavily burdened by sharing this. How much more on her part. But she just laughed at me and said, “Life’s difficult, Marj. We all go through different levels of difficulties. If I lose my faith in Him, to whom shall I cling?”
Many of us these days do not see the significance of suffering. We want life to be easy on us. We love complaining and fishing for sympathy from others. We avoid responsibilities and attribute to others our miseries, our heartbreaks, our pains.
But there is wisdom in absorbing the blow without complaints. Sometimes, the best answer comes in silence. Discernment. Resiliency is made stronger in those who embrace suffering. For it takes a great amount of ability to suffer indignities without losing self-confidence and composure.
Suffering is a fundamental part of our lives. It comes in various forms—all to teach us lessons necessary to keep us going. And when everything feels like it’s crumbling into pieces, remember to talk to Him.
Ask Him why, until when, why me, why not them, and all the other questions you are so tired of dealing with. Rant until you run out of questions. Until you feel His warm embrace, telling you, “I’m here. Worry no more.”
As one of my current colleagues puts it: “Avoid saying to someone struggling that ‘God doesn’t give you anything you can’t handle.‘ It’s making God look sadistic, and like He is just playing favorites. Instead, say, ‘God will provide all the help you need to handle the situation.’”
Dakilanglaagan 